Jeff Foxworthy on Texas

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about folks from Texas ...
If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas ;
If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas ;
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas ;
If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas;
If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas;
If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas ;
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas;
If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas ;
If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph -- you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas ;
If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas ;

Need to be cheered up?
Happy, Texas 79042 Pep, Texas 79353 Smiley, Texas 78159 Paradise, Texas 76073 Rainbow, Texas 76077 Sweet Home, Texas 77987 Comfort, Texas 78013 Friendship, Texas 76530

Love the Sun?
Sun City, Texas 78628 Sunrise, Texas 76661 Sunset, Texas 76270 Sundown, Texas 79372 Sunray, Texas 79086 Sunny Side, Texas 77423

Want something to eat?
Bacon, Texas 76301 Noodle, Texas 79536 Oatmeal , Texas 78605 Turkey, Texas 79261 Trout, Texas 75789 Sugarland, Texas 77479 Salty, Texas 76567 Rice, Texas 75158 Sweetwater, Texas 79556

Why travel to other cities? Texas has them all!
Detroit, Texas 75436 Colorado City, Texas 79512 Cleveland, Texas 77327 Dayton, Texas 77535 Denver City, Texas 79323 Klondike, Texas 75448 Nevada, Texas 75173 Memphis, Texas 79245 Miami, Texas 79059 Boston, Texas 75570 Santa Fe, Texas 77517 Tennessee Colony, Texas 75861 Reno, Texas 75462

Feel like traveling outside the country? Don't bother buying a plane ticket!
Athens, Texas Canadian, Texas 76538 Turkey, Texas 79261 London, Texas 76854 New London, Texas 75682 Paris, Texas 75460

No need to travel to Washington D.C.
Whitehouse, Texas 75791

We even have a city named after our planet!
Earth, Texas 79031

Like to read about History?
Santa Anna, Texas Goliad, Texas Alamo, TexasGun Barrel City, TexasRobert lee, Texas

For the kids...
Kermit, Texas 79745 Elmo, Texas 75118 Nemo, Texas 76070 Tarzan, Texas 79783 Winnie , Texas 77665 Sylvester, Texas 79560

Other city names in Texas , to make you smile.....
Frognot, Texas 75424 Bigfoot, Texas 78005 Hogeye, Texas 75423 Cactus, Texas 79013 Notrees, Texas 79759 Best, Texas 76932 Veribest, Texas 76886 Kickapoo, Texas 75763 Dime Box, Texas 77853 Old Dime Box, Texas 77853 Telephone, Texas 75488 Telegraph, Texas 76883 Whiteface , Texas 79379 Twitty, Texas 79079

And last but not least, the Anti-Al Gore City
Kilgore, Texas 75662

And our favorites...
Cut n Shoot, Texas Gun Barrell City, Amarillo, Texas Hoop And Holler, Plainview, Levelland, Texas Ding Dong, Texas and, of course, Muleshoe, Texas

Here are some little known, very interesting facts about Texas .
1. Beaumont to El Paso : 742 miles 2. Beaumont to Chicago : 770 miles 3. El Paso is closer to California than to Dallas 4. World's first rodeo was in Pecos , July 4, 1883. 5. The Flagship Hotel in Galveston is the only hotel in North America built over water. 6. The Heisman Trophy was named after John William Heisman who was the first full-time coach at Rice University in Houston. 7. Brazoria County has more species of birds than any other area in North America . 8. Aransas Wildlife Refuge is the winter home of No. America 's only remaining flock of whooping cranes. 9. Jalapeno jelly originated in Lake Jackson in 1978. 10. The worst natural disaster in U.S . history was in 1900, caused by a hurricane, in which over 8,000 lives were lost on Galveston Island. 11. The first word spoken from the moon, July 20, 1969, was ' Houston .' 12. King Ranch in South Texas is larger than Rhode Island. 13. Tropical Storm Claudette brought a U.S. rainfall record of 43' in 24 hours in and around Alvin in July of 1979. 14. Texas is the only state to enter the U.S. by TREATY, (known as the Constitution of 1845 by the Republic of Texas to enter the Union ) instead of by annexation. This allows the Texas Flag to fly at the same height as the U.S. Flag, and may divide into 5 states. 15. A Live Oak tree near Fulton is estimated to be 1500 years old. 16. Caddo Lake is the only natural lake in the state. 17. Dr Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. There is no period in Dr Pepper. 18. Dublin , TX has the oldest and only Dr Pepper bottling company that is still working and producing the original Dr Pepper. 19. Texas has had six capital cities: Washington -on- the Brazos, Harrisburg , Galveston , Velasco, West Columbia and Austin. 20. The Capitol Dome in Austin is the only dome in the U.S. which is taller than the Capitol Building in Washington DC (by 7 feet). 21. The name ' Texas ' comes from the Hasini Indian word 'tejas' meaning friends. Tejas is not Spanish for Texas. 22. The State Mascot is the Armadillo (an interesting bit of trivia about the armadillo is they always have four babies. They have one egg, which splits into four, and they either have four males or four females.). 23. The first domed stadium in the U.S. was the Astrodome in Houston.

Cowboy's Ten Commandments posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Fairlie , Texas :
(1) Just one God.(2) Honor yer Ma &Pa. (3) No telling tales or gossipin'. (4) Git yourself to Sunday meeting.(5) Put nothin' before God.(6) No foolin' around with another fellow's gal.(7) No killin'.(8) Watch yer mouth. (9) Don't take what ain't yers. (10) Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's stuff